wanna go halves on a baby?
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
