3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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