You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
