office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize
