Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Randomize
