So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
