I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
