Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
