When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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