Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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