Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize