How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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