writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Randomize
