Swine flu is the new snow day.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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