Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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