So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
