I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
