btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
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