But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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