Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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