its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
