ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
