Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
