I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Let's get the cat blown out
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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