but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
