oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Randomize
