My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
