is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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