I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
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