you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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