ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
