porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
