oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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