Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
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