Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I need water and some morals
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
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