I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
