porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
