THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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