it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
My vagina just clenched in fear
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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