I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
