I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
