We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
My life is pants optional.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
