Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
