that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
