I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
