Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
