is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
