someone threw a dead crab at me
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize