saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Randomize
