I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
We had to coat check the pizza.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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