omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
